Embrace each season of life. For it is just that...a season. You see, I have decided to live, not just endure, each season of my life, and as I am about to embark on a new season in my life, I've done a lot of contemplating on making good use of my time while I stay home with my family. I've done the stay at home mom thing before and I've done the work full time, and being a manager mom thing as well. Although I've done the working mom far more than I have the stay at home mom, I'm ready for this. Im aware of the time I need to give my self, the time I need to give my kids, the time I need to give my husband, and other things in my life that mean a lot to me. Balancing my time is going to be the very thing I'm going to focus on.
The time I have spent working full time and even as a manager is not time waisted by any means. As hard as it was to balance my time between home and work, it was well worth every effort spent. I've learned to be more organized, learned that it is okay to let my kids learn and grow and to be more independent. I've learned about sacrifice and love. I've learned about making time for myself. I have met a lot of people, have made a few life long friends. But most of all, I have learned what is most important in life. I have learned to really try to just go with the flow of life and what it has to offer. Life is ever changing and we as humans are forever growing in many ways.
Season's arent always easy...embrace each one anyways.
Being pregnant this time around hasn't been easy by any means. I've fought to get this little monkey here and it has literally been emotionally draining. I almost gave up and had told Skyler that if I didn't get pregnant this time, I was done trying. I meant it with my whole heart too. Heaven knew better. It wasn't a threat to my father in heaven but an act of me being tired and done with being so emotionaly drained. He knew. He knew how done I had felt. He knew the thoughts I had. He knew how hard work was. He knew how hard I had fought. As excited as I am, it hasn't been easy with this little monkey. Hormones being out of whack, fighting with my thoughts and trying to keep them positive, not letting my anxiety overwealm me, being extremely tired, trying to be patient with a lot of things, (is there such a thing as pregnancy OCD?? If so, I've got it, and it's so intense sometimes). But with all of this said, I still can't get over how blessed I feel. I had a blessing a while back when work was just so much, home seemed to be overwhelming, and I just felt completely incapable of doing any of it. In that blessing I was promised that great things were to come in life and to just keep going forward, keep the faith, keep trying my best and great things will happen soon. That was about a year ago shortly after I had my last miscarriage. Three and half months later I became pregnant. That was the start of the "great things to come". It hasn't been easy, but it has been great. We are having another baby boy, I have patiently waited to be home with my kids and now I am (on His timeline... not mine). And even though it's been tough for Sky, he is doing so good with his new job. I look at my kids and see what amazing humans they are growing into. I see the little blessings that are happening each day. Life is tough, life isn't ever easy, but life is so good. Embrace each season...for it is just that, a season. It too, will pass onto another.
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